Charlie Sheen has nothing if not a random sense of humor. True, that may not have been in evidence over the Christmas holidays when he was arrested for allegedly threatening his wife Brooke Mueller in Aspen, Colorado. But a crime report – courtesy of the Pitkin County Sheriff’s Department – revealed that Sheen not only has ten tattoos, but plans to remove four of them through a cosmetic surgery procedure while keeping some of the more humorously bizarre ones.

According to RadarOnline.com, laser tattoo removal will soon do away with images of angel wings, a Japanese samurai, a Yankees baseball icon and an open zipper with an eyeball emerging.

Those are all going. Which ones are staying? Among others, Sheen is keeping tattoos of a burning Marlboro, a sign reading “Back In 15 Min.,” a stingray, a baseball and Charlie Brown uttering the word “Mom.” The actor is actually down from 12 tattoos, having had two of them already erased. One bore the name of actress Denise Richards, his former wife.

Body art is common for many; body art removal is inevitable for some. But even in this day and age, as men are living months at a time on space stations, the process of erasing tattoos remains long and arduous. Surgeons often perform laser removal on a single piece of body art during sessions that occur every couple months for up to a year, maybe longer. Their laser tools break down tattoo ink into smaller bits, making it easier for human skin to naturally fade it out. Without the assistance of the laser, this natural fading process would take decades. Even still, removing a tattoo doesn’t occur overnight, and may never become that rapid.

Those who may have been curious about Charlie Sheen’s inventory of body art are now duly educated, thanks to a sheriff’s report following his arrest. But given a choice, the actor probably would have preferred the public finding out some other way.

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